Why Men's Groups Need to Stop Forcing Communication and Start Empowering Authenticity
"I hate the forced prompts or ways men's groups want you to communicate or act."
Evin was talking to a guy this week, and she told him about my Free Men's Groups and the upcoming Alchemy of Men Retreat.
He shared he was looking for a Men's Group in San Diego, but he hates how men's groups often have a way that they force people to communicate or express themselves.
As Evin shared this with me, I laughed because I couldn't agree more. She told the guy, my husband feels the same way. He hates how there is this forced way that men think men's work, men's circles, transformation, healing, or growth should happen.
Look, there is nothing wrong with the "Aho," the deep listening sighs, the hands on the heart, the "thank you, brother," or the forced hugging, but if it isn't authentic, or when it's forced, automatic, or the standard, it's just silly and more of the same conditioning.
A big part of men's groups, the retreats I lead, is to help men connect with themselves and their truth and get away from the conditioning society has created around what it means to be a man. Nothing changes if we leave one set of "rules" or "shoulds" just to adopt another set. We must support men to find THEIR truth, who they authentically are, and assist them in stepping fully into that. Men don't need another rule, gimmick, or a new "right way" to be a man. Having someone tell you how to be a man or the right way to be a man is not masculinity.
They need to be empowered, reflective, and inspired to envision to lead and create the kind of man they want to be and then take action to become that man. Not only is this possible, but it's also more freeing, more authentic, and is lasting because it's real and not a shortcut or someone else's truth.
So if it's unclear, I'm here to support men to stand fully and powerfully into the man they are hungry to be. To become the fathers, brothers, husbands, partners, grandfathers, leaders, entrepreneurs, and humans that they are inspired to be so that when they leave this earth, they feel proud of themselves, the men they were, the impact they had, the legacy they left and the relationships they had.
And if they want to "Aho" or sigh deeply or "thank you, brother" or hug along the way, that's fine, but it's always their choice.
Opportunities to work with Alex, for you or the men in your lives!
1. The Torch: A Weekly Virtual Men’s Group & Community
This is a no-brainer, super low commitment way for any growth-minded men to dip their toe in (for just $50/month). Seriously, join us or get your partners, friends, brothers, fathers, etc. in here!!
For an hour every week (but with the expectation of joining at least 2 calls per month), men from all over the world who want to become better partners, fathers, leaders, or just better versions of themselves, connect in a safe space to share and unload their stresses, burdens, and challenges, without judgment or advice.
Alex and his business partner Bob share mini-lessons on empowering topics like mindset and healthy masculinity and then hold space, celebrate honest sharing, and help the men to set intentions in their lives.
Additionally, all members get access to a private online community to share wins, give and get support and advice and build new relationships with other men.
Here is all of the info + the next steps to sign up; if not for you please share with the men in your life!
2. The Alchemy of Men Retreat - coming up June 7-11 in Fairview, Utah - Only 7 Spots Open
This is for the man who would likely never go on a retreat but is interested in personal and professional growth, accomplishing business goals, becoming better partners and parents, and creating brotherhood with other growth-minded men.
For 4 days and 4 Nights, men will enjoy:
-Meals by a New York 5-Star Chef
-A 10,000 sq foot house with sauna, jacuzzi, and cold plunge
-Surrounded by nature
-Powerful work around creating peace, connection, purpose, and clarity in their lives
-Private Rooms, Shared Rooms, and even a Tent Option (for the Outdoorsman) are available, at a range of investment levels.
For more info checkout www.Alchemyofmenretreat.com
If you or the men in your life have questions about any of the above, just email Alex@thedreammason.com.
And remember you can also check out my other blog posts:
Being a Man Is About More Than Just One Thing
Why Integrity Matters: A Personal Story of Honesty and Kindness
Coaching Men: Overcoming Skepticism and Unlocking Personal Growth